Pamela 0:00

They would start at like nine o'clock at night or like ten. We would go up to the arcade that was, like I said, three or four miles away. Um, anyone who was over 18 would buy uh caffeine pills at the at the drugstore. Like yellow jackets. Yeah. And so we would take those. We would be an all night long play. You're listening to premeditated opinions because yes, we thought about it, and then we said it anyway. I'm Pamela.

Josh 0:41

And I'm John. We are two people who somehow air brain and decided to weaponize our brains with microfluid. Each week, we unpack anything from politics and religion to carpool dread and everything in between.

Pamela 0:54

You know, it would really help us a lot if you followed us on Instagram and YouTube. Giving us a like and a follow is probably the best thing your thumbs will do today.

Josh 1:02

We are not experts. We are just way too confident in our own opinions. With all that being said, let's get started. Welcome back to Premeditated Opinions. We are thrilled to be joining you on whatever day it is that you're listening to this because we kind of got a little behind on recording. We're sorry.

Pamela 1:18

Yeah, it happened.

Josh 1:19

Again, we're we're just we're doing our best.

Pamela 1:20

It's just us.

Josh 1:21

It's just us. This is the whole team. So, except for Krista, who just a second ago hit the record button, and we're very grateful for her and all of her unending support. Um, but we are thrilled to be back. We have had uh some really interesting episodes with some really cool interviews in the very recent past. If you haven't had a second, go back and check out either the Ron White Brain Athlete episode. It's really fantastic, as well as um a little a couple episodes before that. We did an interview with Chrissy and Ariel, um, two good friends of ours who are women in their mid-40s who are dating. Uh not each other. They're dating men, um, though, who cares if they did, but um they're they're dating men, or at least making valiant efforts to, but and those two episodes are some of my favorite things that we have done in the whole course of this podcast. So um, please do yourself a favor and go back and listen to those if you haven't already. But we are in the midst of summer. Boy, are we in the midst of summer. And that means that we have children who are desperately trying to figure out ways to entertain themselves.

Pamela 2:26

Oh, yeah.

Josh 2:27

And oh yeah, the it's fine, it's fine. Everything's fine, but we're running out of ideas. Well, and and the so uh Pamela and I have been talking about what we wanted to chat about for this episode, and one thing that's been on my mind that's kind of in the cultural zeitgeist right now, is screen time and just the use of screens overall. And uh, for anyone who doesn't know, that's even the subject of the um Toy Story movie, uh the most recent Toy Story movie is all about the toys versus the screens. And I have not watched it yet. Um but that did kind of prompt a little bit of this idea um to some degree.

Pamela 3:05

It's also not lost on me that if you're watching this on YouTube, it's probably on a screen. Right, yes.

Josh 3:11

One way or another, this is part of your screen time. How dare you? And also thank you.

Pamela 3:16

Yeah, yeah. If you're listening to Apple Podcasts, it's gonna tick that time against your screen time.

Josh 3:21

Uh-huh. Yeah. Uh even if you're doing it on Spotify, still screen time. So anyway.

Pamela 3:26

Sorry, not sorry.

Josh 3:27

Yeah. Well, so we're a responsible use of screen time. What we're here to talk about is less responsible uses of screen time. Um, I guess we can't include YouTube in that because we're literally gonna put this on YouTube, but it's fine. But no, I think I think we're kind of up against that thing that every parent is up against, especially at this point in the year, where it's like, you know, there's uh more parents work full-time jobs now than hardly any other point in history.

Pamela 3:51

Yep.

Josh 3:52

Um, and we're just sort of constantly up against this tension of like we want to be present and we want to try and and do things with our kids during the summer and capitalize on this time and all of that. And in the case of you and me and our spouses, there's whole other things going on. Yeah. You know, and and we're just not in a place where we can drop everything and be fully present for our kids in the summer all the time. Yep. And so one of the things I've thought a lot about this year, and I we've had conversations about it, Kristen and I have had conversations about it, is just like, what do you do? Like, what do you do in these moments where it's like we as parents need the bandwidth to be able to tackle the things that we want to do, need to do. But we also don't really want our kids just parked in front of iPads and phones and YouTube and and Xbox and PlayStation all day.

Pamela 4:43

Um Well and sorry, I'll let you finish up.

Josh 4:46

No, no, no. So I the only thing I was gonna add to that was you know, and for for our kids, the draws are primarily iPads and the Xbox. Um and I know this varies up a little bit from kid to kid, but like Willow is an iPad girly. She I mean her whole social life is on there. Um she's texting with her friends and things like that, and then she plays various games and watches stuff on Netflix and Disney Plus and all that. Isaac, he also enjoys his iPad, but he also is a big Xbox guy. Um, which I've talked about on here a little bit before because I enjoy playing with him sometimes. Um but yeah, it's just it's hard to know, it's hard to know what is good as well.

Pamela 5:27

Yeah, and I mean our kids, you know, they wake up around 10 a.m. roughly. And you know, between 10 and four or five when we get off work, I mean, we don't want them screening that whole time every day, you know, five days a week. And then of course on weekends and yeah, um, it's tough. It's it is it's tough, but at the same time, um you know, it's also like we aren't necessarily responsible for entertaining our children. Yes, you know, so it's like you know, I always think back to when we were kids, you know, in the 90s. We didn't have screens. I mean, we had TVs, yes, in the 1900s. Rude, but anyway. Um, but we had the TV, but if you're like me, my mom was home and she was on the TV. We didn't have computers, so we had to use our imaginations, right? And we had to hang out with our friends, and we, you know, had to go to friends' houses or ride our bikes or you know, get outside and you know, just find stuff to do, right? Um, even if we made a big mess with all the Tupperware. Um that sounds like a story.

Josh 6:50

Uh-huh.

Pamela 6:51

Um, I don't know. When I was younger, I was obsessed with like getting all the Tupperware out, and I had these like beaded necklaces, and I would just like sort them. Wow, okay.

Josh 7:01

Let's you had an eventful childhood.

Pamela 7:03

I did. Wow, I was very type A, apparently.

Josh 7:06

Um did you have did you have like close access to friends or anything like that? Like when you were growing up?

Pamela 7:10

Kind of yes and no. Uh I grew up in an apartment complex. Uh lived so there were kids, but one thing I'm even learning as a parent is a lot of times the kids in your neighborhood aren't necessarily the ones you want your kids hanging out with. Um Madeline's excluded.

Josh 7:32

Yes.

Pamela 7:32

Um, but it was kind of the same way when I was younger, it's like all the kids I could hang out with, like my parents really didn't want me hanging out with. So but then my mom also didn't want to take me anywhere. Um, so yeah, I mean it was it was a lot of bored summer. You know, we had Barbie summer and brat summer.

Josh 7:52

Yeah.

Pamela 7:52

In the 1900s, it was bored summer.

Josh 7:54

Yeah, which was just every summer. Yeah.

Pamela 7:56

Every summer.

Josh 7:57

So were you the kind of kid that looked forward to going back to school?

Pamela 8:00

Nope.

Josh 8:01

Okay. So you were you were happier with the boredom than going back to school.

Pamela 8:05

Yep.

Josh 8:05

See, that that's where I branched off because at some point I would reach a level of boredom in the summer to where it's like, forget it. Just put me back in school. Like, like put me around my friends and my community where I can do things that are are at least a little bit more entertaining than whatever this garbage is that I'm trying to do at home. Because like I had so I was a big um, I was a big bike rider. And so I would hop on my bike during the summer and end up at somebody's house. But typically the houses I would end up at were friends that had some sort of gaming system. Um because I was not allowed. So we had one TV in our house. Okay, well, uh I so I had two households because my parents split when I was 10. So it depended on it depended on whose house I was at, but but both households only had one TV. Um, and that was pretty much dominated by either my mom or my dad, depending. And then um we I was not allowed to have a Nintendo or any sort of gaming system. Like even if I saved up my own money, they would not have permitted me to buy one. And so because to them, that was just the epitome of time waste and garbage. It was it was like the brain rot of the 1900s, basically, which I thought was a load of garbage, but also had no sway in the matter. So I would just go to friends' houses and and play over there. Yeah, but like my bike was my freedom, so I would same. Yeah, I'd I'd get out on my bike, go meet up with friends, and of course, this is way before cell phones, this is landlines and trying to coordinate with people, and then showing up at this friend's house, and oh, he just left, he went over to this guy's house, and then I go over there, and they're not there, and no one knows where they are. So yeah, so like it was just a different sort of season, but like I didn't have anything that really drew my attention as far as screens when I was that age. Like, I just I didn't have access to it, and yeah, we didn't have a computer in my house with the internet on it until I was 17.

Pamela 10:02

Yeah, I was a junior or senior when I got my first Dell Dell desktop, not a laptop. Um, but yeah, um I mean, similar, similar to you. I mean, I guess it kind of depends on when we're talking about, like what age we're talking about. Um another thing that I had going against me is uh growing up, I didn't have health insurance. Oh, okay. So every time I rode that bike, I was rolling the dice, you know, if I got injured, you know, financial ruin, like all of that kind of stuff. So and I did take a couple of spills, um, some pretty bad spills I probably should have gotten stitches for, but you know.

Josh 10:48

I was hit by a car once, yeah, uh on my bike. Uh it was a bunch of high schoolers in a Jeep, actually, and they had a mud guard on the front and they were trying to like taunt me. And I was I was in middle school, they were trying to like taunt me, and the kid was not that skilled of a driver, so he came up too close, and my rear tire caught on the mud guard on the underside of it and flipped me over into a yard and stuff. That was a fun day, and and honestly, like I was bruised up. The thing that made me the most angry is it bent the rim of my bike. And so my bike was out of commission until my dad had enough time to actually like that sucks get parts and replace it. And he wasn't trying to be a jerk about it, it just wasn't that wasn't an era of time where we just had abundant bike replacement parts at whatever store. Like we just didn't, it wasn't an easy thing to acquire. There was no Amazon, you know, you couldn't order anything online. It was just we got to figure out what store has these things, hope they have the right size, blah, blah, blah. But yeah, it's I I I had a couple of pretty serious falls. Um, but it, you know, I managed to figure it out. But I for me, the there just wasn't much to draw me away from hanging out with my friends because I didn't have access to any screens. And then when we got a computer with the internet on it, it was just so slow and ridiculous that I I I was using it because I needed to for school, but like I wasn't super invested. Um the thing that I actually did do with that computer is I bought uh a piece of software, um, which now looking back, I'm sure was illegally acquired. Like I didn't I didn't know that at the time, I didn't understand that, but but uh I bought a copy of Adobe Premiere Pro. It was like CS2 or something like that. Um, but yeah, I was 17 years old and that's when I started editing video. And so I I didn't get on that computer and play games or get on the internet. I got on there and practiced editing video from like a really young age, which is why like all these years later I'm still the premiere guy because it's do you add those years to your resume? I mean, I could. I so what I'd like to say is that that I've been in this professionally since I was 19. And the for me, the the line of demarcation of whether or not I'm professional at it is was I getting paid.

Pamela 13:09

Yeah.

Josh 13:09

But when I was 19, it was the first time I started getting paid to do this kind of thing. And so that was a good chunk of time ago. Um and I'm I'm grateful that I started when I did, but that was my screen time was learning software that then became my career.

Pamela 13:24

Yeah. Um, I mean, mom is probably similar when I got my first computer. So we had a family computer first that I really got access to. And then I finally got my own desktop, like I said, when I was like a junior or senior. But before that, yeah, I mean, it was a lot of riding bikes. I mean, now I well, again, it's hard to say with ages, but you know, when I was in high school and probably late middle school, I mean, I would ride my bike up to the arcade that was probably a good three or four miles from my house. No cell phone, like no nothing. I would go through all the back road, like same paths, like through all these back roads, because I didn't like riding along the main roads. Um, I didn't either I'd ride through all the neighborhoods, I knew all the shortcuts, and um so yeah, I mean, I did that for a long time and you know, also just kind of thinking back, like even just to have those memories, you know, like I am kind of grateful for being bored most of the time because it forced me to use my imagination to like figure out how to get what I wanted or do what I wanted or hang out with my friends or you know, whatever, whatever it was. Um, and I I worry sometimes about like our kids like are they gonna look back and just remember being on Xbox all the time or being on their iPad all the time? Like you know, I'm sure there were times that I went to like the water parks and stuff like that, but most of my memories are just getting into like um my friend had a pretty she lived on a pretty big area of land. It was probably, I don't know, maybe two acres. And she had a bunch of trees, real tall trees. And we would go over there when it was starting to get dark, and her brother and her, we get a bunch of friends together and we'd all play capture the flag. Oh, heck yes. You know, and it was like just stuff like that. Like our our kids aren't interested, or they're just not doing that, they're just not going outside.

Josh 15:34

They're not, they're not going outside as much. And uh so I will say this in in fairness. So you grew up in Louisville and and had uh just a a different sort of um outdoors available to you because of where you grew up. I grew up largely in the northeast corner of Fort Worth. So it's an area called Northwichland Hills. Um it's not that far from where we're sitting right now. Um and that area was already heavily, heavily suburbanized when I lived there. So there was no rural anything. There's no acres, there's no nothing. It was just concrete and buildings and houses. And so even then I remember hearing my dad complain about how like, well, I wish there was better places for you to ride. I wish there was better places for you to to go. Like, I didn't really live very close to any large parks. Um and so and that was, you know, 25, 30 years ago when he has that critique, and it's just so much worse now. And so I do feel a sense of like there, there's there's been the the world around our kids has changed so much that it's hard for me to want to hold them to the exact same standard because it's like you know, the the the home where we live for the last two and a half years was parked between two pretty busy streets in Richardson, Texas, which there's a bazillion people there. Like it I don't want my kids riding their bikes anywhere near Jupiter Road. Yeah. Get away from there.

Pamela 17:07

I don't really even like turning onto that road.

Josh 17:10

Right. Yeah. Like like it's it's not conducive to uh even even a teenager to some degree, like getting out there on a bike. It's just it's a not safe place to be. And and I'm really not like a very safety-minded parent. I could probably used to be a little more, but like I I'm not squeamish about that kind of stuff for the most part. But uh-uh, like I don't want kids on a bike anywhere near that street.

Pamela 17:35

Well, I mean, even where we live here, um, you know, we live in a suburban or a suburb uh neighborhood, you know, tons of kids, but there's nowhere for like my son to go kick his soccer ball around.

Josh 17:49

Right.

Pamela 17:49

Like he would have to go to like a friend's house who maybe has a bigger backyard that he could kick around. But you know, he he really wants to have a bigger space to go out and practice and do his tricks and all that. Um, and it's just not really available, right? Yeah. And without leaving the neighborhood, and I they are building a park at the corner, um, the main corner out here. So I don't know. I I've been thinking about that. Like, what is that gonna look like as far as them being able to go there? And but still, um yeah, it's tough. Like, there's not really a lot of trees, right? You know, like climbing trees and and tree house trees. Oh man, I always wanted a tree house, and like there's a pond in the neighborhood, but again, there's like no trees around it, right? It's covered in duck crap and you know, all kinds of stuff. It's just it's it's so it's kind of like even if I push them outside, where are they gonna go? Yeah, you know, and then people, you know, our street is a city street, and it's a 30 mile an hour street. And even though we're in like a bend in the road, people still fly through there. Yeah.

Josh 19:06

Um, you know, it's hard to it's it's it's hard to know where to have those sort of boundaries because on one hand you want to be protective, and on another hand, it's like, well, I'm I'm I'm not exactly giving them a wealth of options here. Um, so one of the things I've thought about a lot in in the last couple of weeks is I've been trying to figure out, you know, screen time alternatives is like I there's some really amazing like adventure style board games that have come out in the last five, ten years, and I actually really want to try those with the kids. I think that that could be a really fun way for them to get off a screen, engage with each other, do something that's a lot more tactile, all of that. Um you know, having a pool in the backyard doesn't hurt. Uh it gives something to do. Um, but even that, I mean, as much as even I love a pool, you know, on your 45th straight day, you know, you're like, well, this is great. And I did it the last 44 days, you know. And so the way that I've been trying to think about screen time, and I'm curious kind of where you're at, is like I I've just sort of come to embrace it as a reality of how our kids are growing up, they're getting more screen exposure in schools, which that's a hot button all by itself. Um and a lot of how just they're interacting with the world is through devices. And I typically am the kind of guy who's like, okay, if I can't beat it, how do I use it to my advantage? And so I have looked for ways to do that. I have looked for ways to even engage with my kids in their screens and try and and figure out how to make it not just brain rot junk. Um that's almost impossible to do successfully. But but I'm trying, and I think a lot of parents are trying. And and so at this point, you know, they're getting older to the point where they're having they have games that they like, they want to play these games with their friends, and and then you start getting into things like Roblox and the whole nightmare that is that situation. Yeah. Um, and so like I'm just trying to think about it in terms of like, okay, it's here now what? Like like I can't fight it all the time.

Pamela 21:20

I can fight it sometimes, and I do um so yeah, so we did implement some time restrictions, you know. Um, and we've talked about this well, not on the podcast, but um really tightening it down. So, you know, they get screens from like 10 to noon and then off screens till three, and then you can get back on basically until dinner, so like six, six thirty ish. Um and that's it.

Josh 21:50

Yeah.

Pamela 21:51

And and and then there always comes the okay, well, but does T V count as screens? Right. You know, and it's kind of like you know, having to talk through. Well, Saturday morning, the kids get up before we do. You know, what are it's kind of hard to say, no, you can't get on the TV. So, you know, we've tried to steer them like, okay, if you're gonna get on the TV, you need to be watching like Saturday morning cartoons, right? Sunday morning cartoons, or you know, whatever that equivalent is now on Netflix. Yeah, it's like we just don't want you scrolling YouTube shorts and you know what I don't even know what they're all into, but I have noticed though, and we've talked about this, like you know, now that you all are a lot closer, the kids I feel like are kind of taking advantage of that time that they don't have screens. Like I think they are starting to figure out things to do that aren't screens. Yeah, um, you know, we we have started implementing like chores now that requires a screen, right? But you know, you gotta look at that before screen time's up and then you know, do your chores or get in the pool, hang out. Like, um, you know, we started bringing back puzzles.

Josh 23:12

Yes, yeah. I love a puzzle. I don't puzzle is a great use of time as far as I'm concerned.

Pamela 23:19

My problem is I get addicted. Like, once I get so far into it, I'm like, I gotta finish this, and I'm like up all night. Um, I I have a hard time doing the like, oh yeah, I'll just find a couple of pieces.

Josh 23:30

Like you're not casual about it. No, you just yeah, no, yeah. Well, there's probably a 12-step program. But the the the reality is like I I'm I'm with you. So we're running our kids on the same schedule because it's beneficial to have everybody doing the same thing. And and so um our kids are so attached. So the the reality is like I'm seeing the same things. I'm seeing this really intentional sort of shift in some of how they're using time in that screen time break. And I'm seeing a little bit more community and a little bit more communication and all that. And it's a huge win, and I'm here for it. Um, and then you know, we we're only what three weeks out from school starting at this point, maybe four weeks out. And you know, it that'll take care of a lot of this problem um in that they're gonna have all manner of other things to do during the day and it's gonna shift this entirely. But yeah, I think at the end of the day, the for better or worse, I am just not putting a crazy amount of pressure on myself as a parent to get this perfect. Because what even is perfect?

Pamela 24:39

Yeah, I I think we also have an advantage in the fact that like we lived through Facebook and Instagram and Doom Scrolling and all of that. And then by the time our kids kind of started getting screens, we were already like, okay, like we don't want you falling into this trap. Right. So while the kids do get screens, like I'm still pretty picky about what they have access to as far as apps go. Um, they have time limits on those apps. Um, like my daughter's on Pinterest. I mean, I know I can, you know, spend 12 hours scrolling Pinterest. So like I cap her in an hour. Um, same thing with my son. Uh he a lot of his favorite apps. I'm like capped in an hour because, and you can probably attest to this too. There are times like you'll be doing something and it'll be three or four hours later, and you have no idea what you just did. Like that you've been on this particular app or doing this particular thing for hours and hours, which I mean kind of speaks a little bit to good work ethic.

Josh 25:42

Right. Look how dedicated we are.

Pamela 25:45

Yeah, but at the same time, it's like, so what did you do today?

Josh 25:48

Yeah.

Pamela 25:48

Like they can't tell you. And and that's the thing. I don't want them to look back and remember summers and childhood. Like, I want them to remember the fun things they did, the times they went home to Kentucky, the the things that they did with their friends. And and I've noticed too, since we've put those restrictions in, you know, it was a little difficult at first. You know, there's a lot of I'm bored, I don't know what to do. And it was like, well, we'll find you something to do. Right, yeah. You're not gonna like it.

Josh 26:14

Yeah.

Pamela 26:15

Um, and then they started hanging out like and started getting along and started, I mean, not that they weren't getting along, but like you could just tell there was like a change in attitude, like they wanted to hang out with each other, like all of them. So even like so our kids eight range in age from nine to thirteen. And that's kind of a big gap at that age. It is, and they were still all like hanging out in the pool and and playing games together. And I don't know, it was it was it was it kind of felt like a win.

Josh 26:49

Yeah, it is a win.

Pamela 26:50

You know, it felt like a win. Um I don't know. I it still seems to be working. I haven't heard too much complaining um lately.

Josh 26:59

Me either. And I'm I'm right there with you. Like I think, you know, the the individual app restrictions that we are also doing that. Um and then like our kids don't have any access right now to anything that looks like social media at this juncture. Um, and that's just entirely for their own protection. Yeah, and and Willow has already worked on me several times trying to get me to lift that. And it's like, no, like I'm just it's not happening.

Pamela 27:26

Well, and my daughter didn't get it till I think she was 12 or 13. And even then, like I spent days locking it down, testing it out, seeing what she'd be able to see, you know, seeing what was gonna come up on, you know, the for you pages and all of that. So so um, and I try to be really intentional and strategic about it. Like she doesn't just have access to anything.

Josh 27:51

Oh no.

Pamela 27:52

Um, but there are a couple, but but my daughter also is a little bit different in the fact that like if a stranger tries to message her, I'm the first person she texts.

Josh 28:04

Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Pamela 28:05

You know, and then it's like, oh, okay. Um, whereas some of I'm not sure my son would he'd probably think he's talking to like an NPC or something, and I'm like, dude. So I mean, it's an age thing.

Josh 28:19

Um it's a maturity thing, too.

Pamela 28:21

Yeah, it is a maturity thing. Trust me, I was the last person who thought I'd ever give my kids social media, but she just has Pinterest in TikTok, which I know is controversial, but well, but you locked down the living daylights out of that TikTok account.

Josh 28:35

So hard. Yeah. And and but the reason you did that too, and I only know this because my own children have both participated in this, but she posts really funny stuff that they'll like find on TikTok and then recreate. And it's all very innocent and it's very entertaining and silly. And like that kind of thing, I'm fully on board with.

Pamela 29:01

And only we can see it. So like it's only public. No, no, no, no, not even close. Nothing is public. She can't receive any messages, no DMs. Um, in fact, I still struggle sometimes to try to get people added to her account because I have it so locked. Um, I have keywords in there um that you know, so she shouldn't be getting certain material. Um, there's age restrictions, there's all kinds of stuff. And so far we haven't had a problem, but she also knows like if we start having a problem, her access is gonna get yanked. Yeah. So yeah.

Josh 29:36

Yeah. Well, and I think at the end of the day, like where I have left off for myself as a parent is like, we're just not gonna get this perfect. I'm gonna make every effort to get it as close to perfect as I can. And I've got grace for myself and for my spouse and for my kids and all that around all of this stuff because it's like we're all of this is changing so quickly, and we are doing our best as parents to both be a parent and be basically an IT support desk. Yeah, you know, because that's what parenting is in 2026. It's managing devices and accounts and all this stuff.

Pamela 30:15

Well, but we had it when we were kids. I mean, it just looked different, yeah. You know, it was like it was the TV and the Nintendo or the PlayStation or the Sega or whatever, and now it's the iPad.

Josh 30:28

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Pamela 30:28

You know, and of course, like the iPad's got a ton more options and like you know, internet accessibility, but it's it's the same, I feel like it's like the same conversation, just different contexts a little bit, you know? Totally. Because at the same time, like I I don't think that my kids shouldn't have screens. I'd like them to like not want them, but at the same time, that's just like saying, Oh, well, when I was in seventh grade, like why did I want to play Nintendo? Right. You know, and like I have good memories of playing a lot of games, um, which would be the same thing as, you know, I know your son plays Rocket League in certain games. Like, he will look back and say, Oh, yeah, like I we played Rocket League on the Xbox, and it's kids are gonna be like, I don't even know what that is, you know, and and like so we'll they'll have those kinds of stories. I want those them to have those kinds of stories. I don't want it to, I don't want them to look back and just be like, I don't I just I was on my screen, yeah, I was on my iPad all day.

Josh 31:36

What was your first gaming console?

Pamela 31:40

Um that okay, so our first gaming console was a family gaming console. Okay. Um so we had the SNES. Okay. Um my first gaming console was a hand me down, was my dad's N64, which I still have.

Josh 32:00

Oh, sweet. Yeah, so what was your game on SNES? Like what was your jam?

Pamela 32:09

Did that one have Duck Hunt?

Josh 32:10

That was original Nintendo. I I don't think SNES had Duck Hunt, but I could be wrong.

Pamela 32:15

Okay, maybe we did have an original Nintendo. For some reason, I didn't think that we did, but I do remember playing Duck Hunt at home. So maybe we had an OG Nintendo and then we had the Super Nintendo.

Josh 32:26

Yeah.

Pamela 32:26

Um I I I'll be honest, I didn't play it a lot. It was pretty much my dad's.

Josh 32:32

Okay.

Pamela 32:32

But once I got my once I got the N64, uh, it was Super Mario Bros. Uh Zelda, Legend of Ocarina, or Ocarina of Times, yeah. Um, which is a bringing back. Yep. Uh GoldenEye.

Josh 32:48

Yes.

Pamela 32:49

Um, I remember playing Star Fox.

Josh 32:54

Yep.

Pamela 32:55

Um, but I do also remember going to my friend's house, and her brother had a PlayStation. And I remember him playing like Crash Bandicoot and all that kind of stuff. So it's like I do like having those memories. Yeah. And like I do want them to have memories of games that they played and stuff like that, but I just don't want it to be an all-consuming that's all I did all day, every day.

Josh 33:17

So my my earliest minutes, so I did not have a console at home growing up at all. Like I did not own my own console until after I was married. Wait, no, that's not true. I I had an original Xbox when I lived with my roommate, it was one of my best friends growing up, great guy. Um so he and I lived together for a few years before I got married, and I had an Xbox when we lived together. Um but when I was growing up, to get any access to those games, I was biking to a friend of mine's house. And my buddy Ben, um he had he was the first guy I knew of the N64. Um, and Goldeneye was our obsession. I mean, we played so much Goldeneye to the point he got so good at it to where he could there's a term for it and I've forgotten it, but it's like spawn camping or something like that. Like he could set proximity mines at all of the places where you would spawn after you died. So you'd die, you'd spawn, the proximity mine would go off, and you'd die again. And so he got so good at that game that he could lay all those charges down. So it got to a point where I just wouldn't play with them anymore. Um, but then my my biggest like entry into gaming on on like a community level, and I do have great memories around this, was Xbox land parties.

Pamela 34:44

Oh yeah. I so yes, I didn't do Xbox, I did computer. Yeah, but I would bite so they would do them on the weekends, they would start at like nine o'clock at night or like 10. We would go up to the arcade that was, like I said, three or four miles away. Um, anyone who was over 18 would buy caffeine pills at the at the drugstore.

Josh 35:09

We just did Mountain Dew.

Pamela 35:10

We didn't buy the pills, like yellow jackets. No, yeah, and so we would take those, we would be up all night long playing, yeah, at Tech World. Um, so so Golden Eye was like my gateway drug into Half-Life Counter Strike, yep. Um, so we would play Counter Strike for hours into the morning, and then yeah, yeah.

Josh 35:34

So we would do so I I would also do uh PC LAN parties, but that was clunkier for me. I did have a computer at the time, um, but it was just a lot more component.

Pamela 35:45

That's why we went to the arcade because they had the highest speed for the time, you know. So because it was the same thing, like people would try to play from home, yeah, but it was so glitchy and yeah, laggy and all that. So we would that's why we'd all and we'd all be wired in.

Josh 36:02

Yeah.

Pamela 36:03

And so, like for the most part, I mean, it would still glitch and lag a little bit, but you know, for this was probably like 2000, 2000, 2001, yeah. 99, somewhere in there.

Josh 36:17

Yeah, for me, it was probably oh two, oh three was sort of when I was getting into it pretty seriously. But that was when I got into the Xbox land parties, and I was such a nerd when I was growing up. I got good at the networking side of it. So my buddy's house, he had parents that didn't care if we were all there. So we would go to his house, and I would always be one of the first ones to show up because I'd start pulling out all the network infrastructure. So like his parents, uh, I his parents like had some stuff that was already there, and then we would bring more stuff. So we had a couple of network switches and all this cabling, and so we would figure out where everyone needed to sit, where all the consoles needed to be and stuff, and then we would network them all together. Um, and so I got good at that part of it, and um then we would play, we'd have these epic Halo parties. And so that was that was our game of choice at the time. Yeah, and at the time there was nothing else really like it. Like there were some competitors, but Halo was was groundbreaking, and so yeah, man, we god, we'd be there. It was never yellow jackets, that was never our our method of choice, but it was like Mountain Dew and Snickers bars and and like highly caffeinated beverages.

Pamela 37:31

And I remember you weren't hardcore like the Louisville crowd.

Josh 37:35

No, no, I wanted to have like internal organs when we were all done, you know. But I I I still remember plenty of mornings of like, okay, you play and you play and you play, and it's like four in the morning, and everyone's too exhausted, and so you you jump off. And I remember so many times like being done playing and being like, My stomach hurts. Yeah, because I just consumed so much and sugar and all this, and I was like, why do I feel so lousy?

Pamela 38:02

See, we didn't feel like that, we just felt like we were gonna shake out of our skin.

Josh 38:07

Exactly. Yeah, yeah. Your trade-off was like methamphetamine laced like craziness. But we we did have some great times. I I I really enjoyed that season of life. Um, yeah, and you know, at this point, online gaming makes it all a lot easier, and and the the the the ability to play with people from all over the world in different games is pretty cool. And like I I still enjoy playing games. I don't get to nearly as much as I'd like to. Yeah, but but I do like it. It it's fun, and there's some incredible games out there now.

Pamela 38:41

And I think, I mean, yeah, I mean, there are obviously like negative side effects of gaming, like there's you know, predatory things or like screens, I mean not gaming, but screens, you know, there's the predatory online issues and you know, blue light and all that. Um, but I think also this goes back to um one of our very first episodes when we talk about how we just we cherish nostalgia, yeah, yeah. You know, we really do, and we want that for our kids, you know, because it's so fun to sit here and talk about all the stuff that we did, and we want our kids to be able to do the same thing. Yeah, so they want I want them to have stories that they're telling their friends in college or you know, their kids when they grow up and all that kind of stuff. So it's it's a little bit of preserving some of that, you know, making sure that you are doing something more than just doom scrolling all day, which I don't think our kids, especially now that we put limits.

Josh 39:44

Yeah, yeah.

Pamela 39:45

I think I think my hope is that some of that stuff they're just gonna get tired of because they won't have enough time, even though they get five hours a day. Right. Which sounds nuts when you say it out loud. Meaning, like, oh, they had more than that, maybe.

Josh 40:02

Yeah, that's we're surviving.

Pamela 40:04

I think I think we need to give ourselves a little bit of grace because we had screens and we turned out like this.

Josh 40:10

Totally right. We turned out exactly the way that we are. God help us. Yeah, yeah. We're very mentally stable. There's no history of like mental illness or substance abuse in our generation. I mean, across the board, our generation's pretty flawless. So the millennials really just We nailed it. Yeah, yeah. No notes. Um, I do want to bring one more thing up. So um, over this last weekend, you took um our daughters plus one of their friends um to see Lindsay Sterling. So why don't you tell the ladies and gentlemen a little bit of who Lindsay Sterling is for the uninitiated and just kind of what your experience was?

Pamela 40:49

So funny enough, I was actually um I was like Googling her for some reason earlier today, and I didn't realize that her like quote unquote debut was on America's Got Talent.

Josh 41:04

Oh, I didn't know that either.

Pamela 41:05

Yeah, so 2010. Oh, she was on America's Got Talent.

Josh 41:09

That's like season one, I think.

Pamela 41:11

It was very early, and unfortunately, like they were not kind to her. Um, but funny enough, she came back as a guest artist 2014, no, 2014, 2018, 2020, 2021, like wow, doing her thing. But um my husband introduced me to her. Um, she's so she's um she's a violinist, but she does EDM.

Josh 41:43

Yeah.

Pamela 41:43

And like she calls it hip hop, but I'm like, it's EDM.

Josh 41:47

Yeah.

Pamela 41:47

EDM violin.

Josh 41:49

Yeah.

Pamela 41:49

Uh, but she doesn't, she's so much more than that. She danced, she's a dancer. Um, she I think she has her own comic book series that she put together. Um her tours all have um she she hand makes her outfits and the outfits for her um dancers.

Josh 42:13

Wow.

Pamela 42:14

Um, so if you go through her Instagram and it's L-I-N-D-S-E-Y-S-T-I-R-L-I-N-G, she's uh California, no Utah. I think she's from Utah. Um but she she'll have reels in there of her tours and just you know clips from you know the performances, and then you'll see her like washing her outfits in the tub of the hotel, like doing like laundry, and yeah, and then you know you'll see where she's like stitching stuff up. And I mean her her stuff is incredible. I mean, she's she's so talented, and it's just unfortunate because so many people haven't heard of her, right? I mean, she's definitely grown in popularity. I can almost guarantee you've probably heard her on some Christmas songs in the last couple of years. She's got um a couple of Christmas albums. So if you've heard any songs, Christmas songs in the last couple of years of the violin, it's probably her. Yeah. Um but um yeah, so so my daughter plays violin. And well, let me back up. So the first year we moved here that summer, Lindsay Sterling was playing in Oklahoma City, and we got tickets and we drove up there with the kids because we my husband and I were big fans. Well, it was an outdoor concert in like July.

Josh 43:43

Ugh. And no, thank you, please.

Pamela 43:45

She wasn't coming any closer, like she wasn't going any further south. So so we drove up there and it's still hot. And Logan's crying the whole time because he's hot and getting eaten up by bugs and all this stuff, and you know, by Time she got started, like we got through a couple of songs and then we called it. Um, but it did spark enough in my daughter to for her to want to take up the violin.

Josh 44:11

Yeah.

Pamela 44:11

Now at the time, again, it was over the summer. Um I think it was maybe a couple of months after that, we rented her a violin and started getting her private lessons. Like she she the age that she was, they didn't have orchestra. So she couldn't like join the orchestra at school. Um, so we just got her into private lessons. And um so when I saw that she was coming to Fort Worth, I immediately pretty much just got four tickets. And I was like, four people are coming. And so it was me and her, um, your daughter, um, and then one of my daughter's friends from Orchestra. Yeah, she's in Orchestra now, but it was amazing. Um, it was just as cool as the first show that we saw, if not better. Well, it was better because it was inside. Right. Um, so we weren't dying. Yeah. Um, and it was funny. She she said the same thing. She's like, Oh, she's like, I love it here. She's like, This is the first stop on my tour where we're inside.

Josh 45:15

Wow.

Pamela 45:15

Like she'd been in like Florida and Georgia, a couple other places. Yeah, and it's exceptionally hot right now.

Josh 45:23

Yeah.

Pamela 45:23

Too.

Josh 45:24

So well, and when you're performing like that and and you you're you've got outfits. She's dancing, and she's an athlete who is also a musician. Like all the clips I've seen of her, she is absolutely an athlete.

Pamela 45:35

She was on dancing with the stars.

Josh 45:37

Really?

Pamela 45:37

I didn't know that, but yeah, I things I learned today. Um, but uh it was interesting. I think what what triggered it was I was scrolling through her Instagram and she had a one where she was she had her America's Got Talent outfit on like a mannequin. And she like her Instagram was something about like the last time I wore this, something, something, something. So then I went back and watched it. And I mean, she was good. I mean, she was still dancing just like she does she does today. She still had she had a little more of the oh, what do you call it? Like kind of an anime vibe. Like she she's really into like manga and anime and all that kind of stuff. Um, so she kind of had that like K pop look to her, you know, from like 2010. Um but she did make some mistakes because she was pushing herself outside of her comfort zone. She had never been like lifted up before while playing and it and it messed her up. And they just were not kind. Uh it was it was uh Pierce was Howie and was Simon Callis still on that one?

Josh 46:58

Or no he was just doing the British one.

Pamela 47:01

Yeah, it was later he he was on, but anyway, I can't I can't remember who the third person was. Anyway, but she just she just stood there and like she smiled, she's just like thank you while they're just tearing her to shreds. Yeah, she's just like thank you, and then like you kind of start to see her like deflate a little bit.

Josh 47:19

Yeah, but well now she's playing violin upside down, hanging from streamers.

Pamela 47:23

I know. I was actually kind of excited to see that she was like a guest appearance going back, kind of like how do you like me now?

Josh 47:31

Yeah, yeah.

Pamela 47:32

I now the thing is she's very humble, she's very down to earth, she's very just silly. I didn't realize that she's our age, yeah. Like, I'm like, yeah, I'm never gonna move like that.

Josh 47:44

Well, it's never gonna be if we were gonna do that, we would have needed to start about 20 years ago.

Pamela 47:48

Yeah, but she was a classically trained violinist, she like 17 years, she did dance, like she's incredible. She is incredible, she is such an underrated performer. I guess I don't know, she's just not very popular, yeah. And I I just feel like more people should know who she is.

Josh 48:09

Yeah, no, that's well, you heard it here first. Mm-hmm. Go check out Lindsay Sterling. But seriously, actually, go check out Lindsay Sterling. Um, now I I was familiar with her because of her classical career, and and I knew who she was, and that she was kind of you know taking an instrument that isn't typically paired with other more electronic genres or even more rock and roll genres, like you know, uh a clip that you showed me from the concert. She was they're playing a uh a Leonard Skinner song. Well, no, not Leonard Skinner, it was uh um I don't know, it was uh I can't remember. Yeah, it was like a major 70s rock hit that she was playing the melody of that song over the top of a very in-your-face rock and roll kind of moment. And it was it was awesome. Um, like I I really enjoyed it.

Pamela 48:55

And I feel like she's got a little something for everybody. Because again, like, yeah, I mean, a lot of her stuff is like heavy bass, EDM kind of thing stuff, but like some of her newer stuff. I mean, she's got some rock, she's got her Christmas albums enough. Like, if you don't like any of her other stuff, you'll like her renditions of the Christmas songs. I mean, she's even had Sabrina Carpenter. Nice. Um, she was on a song with um Pentatonics.

Josh 49:25

Oh, oh, yeah.

Pamela 49:26

Yeah.

Josh 49:26

Um they managed to stay pretty big.

Pamela 49:29

Yeah, so I took my daughter to see them when we live back in Kentucky, and she that album that they had Lindsay on, like they played it at the show. And they kind of had her up on the screen, like she wasn't there, yeah, but they had her like playing her violin, and yeah.

Josh 49:48

Anyway, that's really cool. No, I I I love any excuse to bring young people to live music.

Pamela 49:55

I think it's a great way to night to watch just like when she so she gets in these like ribbons, like she she ties up like in these ribbons, and then she's playing, and then she flips upside down and does the splits and is still playing. Yeah, and the girls, I wish I could have gotten a picture.

Josh 50:11

I just look over and they're just jaws to the floor, man.

Pamela 50:15

They're like just wowed. And I was like, um, this was Cassie's friend's first concert, and I was like, Well, you have been ruined on concerts, like, nothing is gonna live up to this.

Josh 50:28

Like, yeah, and it's pretty much Willow's first concert, too. My daughter's first concert. Like, she she's seen other live music for sure, but as far as something with this kind of production value, this is pretty much her first one on this level, and so yeah, it's it's for that to be the start, that's a strong start. Yeah, that's a really strong start.

Pamela 50:49

And I had I didn't know that, like I didn't know that this was like not their first con or that this was their first concert. Yeah um, you know, because I've taken a cast to or I've taken Cassie to so many things, but um yeah, that's cool. At the same time, I was like, Well, I'm glad this is your first one, and I'm sorry for your next, right?

Josh 51:09

It sets a bar pretty high, but you know, we'll figure it out. But but no, that's really cool. I I I I'm grateful that that you took our kid to that's awesome, and she had an amazing time and has raved about it. Um, but yeah, I I I am familiar with Lindsay Sterling. If you, dear listener, are not, um, it's it's worth your time, especially in the holidays. Like her it's her Christmas albums are a nice little shake up from the usual Christmas stuff.

Pamela 51:34

You probably heard her Carol of the Bells, and you just don't know it.

Josh 51:37

It's it's really popular, but uh no, so check her out. Go give her a Google. Um, and when she blows up because of our massive influence on pop culture, um, she has us to thank, you know. So that that's what we're doing. And we'll still be here recording at a kitchen table.

Pamela 51:53

Just the two of us.

Josh 51:54

Yep. Yeah.

Pamela 51:57

We won't be seeing royalties.

Josh 52:00

Right, exactly. However, if she wants to send us some, please and thank you.

Pamela 52:03

There won't be any sponsorship. It's fine.

Josh 52:05

No, no. This segment actually was brought to you by Yellow Jacket Caffeine Pills. Uh I wonder if they still make those. I'm sure they make some version of it after the many lawsuits I'm sure they've been in a long time. Oh, yeah. But but no, thank you all so much for joining us um as we discussed all things screen time and parenting and Lindsay Sterling. And yeah, this was an eclectic episode. But at the same time, um, it is all very relevant to just where we're at uh and where some of you are probably at as well, and just trying to figure out how to maneuver through summers with kids that have increasingly more demanding uh needs and attention spans and all that stuff. It's it's not easy. Um but yourself, Grace. Yeah, and you're not alone.

Pamela 52:47

You is not your responsibility to entertain.

Josh 52:50

Right.

Pamela 52:50

You don't even have to give them suggestions.

Josh 52:53

I mean, it helps, but and if you have a glass of wine at lunch, there's not gonna be any judgment here. You know, just do your thing. But thank you all so much for joining us. Uh, we are thrilled to have you as always. Um, and the usual spiel all still applies. Please go follow us on Substack on YouTube, on Instagram, on TikTok. You can find us on Facebook. We're literally everywhere. Uh, and so please give all of those things a follow. It's hugely helpful to us. Yep. Um, we do have premium content on Substack, I promise. Um, and when there's time, we will have more on there. Um, but right now it's kind of been all we can do to just keep up with the main thing.

Pamela 53:28

Yeah, because I think we're probably going on six months since I asked for the blooper reels.

Josh 53:32

Right, yeah, I know. Uh-huh. Yep. Cool. That's that's neat. Um but yeah, we we have we do have content, we promise. And we will have more someday, we promise.

Pamela 53:43

We will.

Josh 53:43

Um, but yeah, we're so appreciative that you're allowing us into your headspace and into wherever you're listening to us. And uh yeah, please share us with your friends and your family and tell them to come get weird right alongside us because that's basically what we do every single episode.

Pamela 53:58

So one more thing.

Josh 54:00

Uh-huh.

Pamela 54:00

We are on Google AI.

Josh 54:04

Gemini?

Pamela 54:05

Like, like uh, you know, when you Google now and like you and it brings up like an AI like like summary.

Josh 54:13

Powered by Gemini.

Pamela 54:14

If you put in premeditated opinions, it brings us up.

Josh 54:17

Nice.

Pamela 54:18

Yeah. We're so famous. Yeah.

Josh 54:19

Look at our search engine optimization hard at work. But yeah, yeah. Just give us a few Googles just to boost our rating a little bit and then interact with whatever pops up. That would be fantastic.

Pamela 54:30

Yeah.

Josh 54:30

But anyway, thank you all so much for joining us, and we will probably be right back in your ear holes in a couple weeks.

Pamela 54:36

We will. Well, that's it for premeditated opinions, where the thoughts were fully baked and only mildly regrettable. If you enjoyed today's episode, congrats on having truly excellent taste in the podcast. Following us on YouTube and Instagram is a quick and easy way to support us. So if you liked literally anything about today's episode, please like and subscribe.

Josh 54:59

Also, someone who needs to feel seen, dragged, or both. We'll be back next week with more unsolicited insight and emotionally responsible spotlight. And until then, please stay hydrated and behave yourself in the comments. But if you don't, then please make it.